The ultimate goal of resolving differences is to reach a permanent solution. A quick fix won't last unless it can be turned into a satisfying settlement.
Given an opportunity to reflect on hastily resolved conflicts, people often admit dissatisfaction with their acceptance of a "feel good" solution. Their willingness to settle quickly is often based on an evasive or defensive reaction.
A productive resolution involves blending each person's expectations. So, deeper discussions may be necessary before a durable resolution is achieved. Taking the time to work out a permanent solution builds trust and establishes commitment.
Be aware, however, that when you step in to "manage" a conflict between friends or colleagues, the resolution belongs to you; it's your idea, not theirs.
If you're really good at it, others will depend on you to act as adjudicator when conflicts arise which is time-consuming, unproductive and potentially dysfunctional. These folks have nothing vested in the decision, so they don't feel responsible for either the conflict or the means of resolving it.
Encouraging others to manage their own conflicts places the responsibility on their shoulders and frees you up to pursue more fruitful endeavors.
Collaborators openly express their concerns, readily pose difficult questions and willingly face the core issues that are keeping them from achieving success.
Note: Learn to work with people you don't know, don't trust, don't like.
V.O.R.
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